Sausage
Tuesday 27th March
A question was posed on 43Things which I actually found quite interesting to answer… especially when you begin thinking around all the facets of the problem.
The question runs thus:
One half of your body is going to be turned into a sausage. Would you like your top half or bottom half to be made of sausage? Why?
what i find even more interesting is that you, stu, (a clever chap) admit to finding this question interesting at all.
sorry to sound a bit rude but i mentally file this sort of stuff under ’stupid rubbish that an idiot has put on the internet’.
henry
27 Mar 07 at 11:58 am
Sorry but I’m with Henry….
Mr Hedgehog
27 Mar 07 at 12:35 pm
Ooh now that’s a good question. Hmmm. Top. No, bottom. No, top. Argh! I can’t decide! Can I have both?
I can see where henry is coming from but would life be worth living without pondering such strange ideas? Maybe. Maybe not.
Rich
27 Mar 07 at 12:54 pm
(Some) People think if you cut a worm in half then both ends will still live. However, whilst it can grow another tail it will find it difficult to grow a head…
Mr Hedgehog
27 Mar 07 at 1:12 pm
I bet you prefer spending your time with matters of concern*, Henry
(*cf. The Little Prince, Antoine de Saint-Exupery)
Nah… I love pondering stupid questions. It makes the hard stuff more palatable.
stu
27 Mar 07 at 1:20 pm
The left side, since it would mean I’d get rid of the constant pain of the broken shoulder / arm and my dodgy hip. (which would obviously be replaced with pain just down my entire centre. Which would be a novelty).
Of course I’d never be able to play the guitar again. Some people might say that would be a good thing.
rollasoc
27 Mar 07 at 1:52 pm
What sort of sausage?
JG
27 Mar 07 at 3:05 pm
Any sort, JG… you choose.
stu
27 Mar 07 at 3:48 pm
Lower half, cumberland.
Kouros
27 Mar 07 at 5:22 pm
i will NOT let you make me think about this stupid sausage question.
and anyway you would be dead whether it was your top half or bottom half that had been through a sossidgizer.
would you rather wake up to find that all your hair had fallen out or all your teeth?
i got that off ‘extras’ and it’s a much better question.
henry
27 Mar 07 at 6:24 pm
Kouros Says:
Lower half, cumberland.
*snigger*
omally
27 Mar 07 at 7:04 pm
So what was your interesting answer, Stu? Anyway, if your top half was a sausage, how would you know that - unless your brain had migrated to the lower half? And if your bottom half was a sausage, you could eat it with your top half, and then you would be both legless (and bottomless) and sausageless… or if you refrained from eating it, you could wander (?) around saying “does my sausage look big in this?”.
Qaminante
27 Mar 07 at 7:25 pm
mmmm sausage.
plume
27 Mar 07 at 8:18 pm
Bottom half, because otherwise I’d be dead.
Here’s the real question though: Made of sausage or turned into a sausage. Because surely just being made of sausage would just be meat instead of what i currently have (meat and bones and hair and nail). Actually correct that, sausage probably has all those things anyway! But you get what I mean, if it were to look like a conventional sausage it’s going to cause rather more comment than if it were just made out of sausage.
Not that I’ve thought about this today at all.
No.
Sarah
27 Mar 07 at 8:36 pm
My answer was thus:
As long as I could still hop around in some manner, I’d like my bottom half to be a sausage. Then I could still use my arms and head.
Though I guess I would be more vulnerable to hungry dogs than if my top half was a sausage.
Henry: The answer is hair of course.
stu
27 Mar 07 at 8:43 pm
How about a vegetarian sausage?
max
27 Mar 07 at 9:09 pm
Stu: you are a total sausage!
Did you see this about the giant toad? Ours don’t get this big.
http://www.breitbart.com/article.php?id=D8O4E0GO0&show_article=1
Now the question is: Would you rather be a total sausage or a giant toad?
Debster
27 Mar 07 at 9:29 pm
I would have picked toad because the sausage is eaten. But it seems the toads are gassed and turned into fertilizer. So I’ll go for sausage… it’ll be quicker.
stu
27 Mar 07 at 9:33 pm
In Quantumland, you are already a sausage. In some other dimension
lordhutton
27 Mar 07 at 9:41 pm
That is a very good point, Hutters.
stu
27 Mar 07 at 9:44 pm
i prefer to be a whole sausage. else it be too traumatic to BBQ the top or bottom half of me with the other half struggling and writhing in agony.
boo
28 Mar 07 at 1:20 am
But I thought 43things was just a list of things people want to do??? does someone want one half of them to be turned into a sausage…
Mr Hedgehog
28 Mar 07 at 8:04 am
There’s a bit more community than that, Mr. H… one of the goals is post random questions daily and see if anyone plays with me and answers them
.
stu
28 Mar 07 at 8:15 am
*goes to check on 43things.com and see what i’m missing out on*
Mr Hedgehog
28 Mar 07 at 8:21 am
I can’t believe this blog attracted 24 comments actually dealing with the question in one way or another…..and I read them all, waiting for the one that made me go ‘ah, that’s a good one’….I’m with henry on this.
Kika
28 Mar 07 at 8:48 am
Kika beat me to it. But now I’m with Mr. H - who on 43Things wants half of themselves turned into a sausage? Ewwwww. Why does that NOT surprise me after some of what I read there yesterday? (Stu, did I mention your kind comment was well timed, much-needed, and greatly appreciated?) What scares me is that you could throw something utterly nonsensical like this out there, Stu, and there’s likely to be a whole cult of “I wanna be a half-sausage” people. They’ll branch off into rival cults (”I want to be a BLOOD sausage!” and “No, BRATWURST is BEST!”) and … oh, what is civilization coming to?
Holly
3 Apr 07 at 1:13 pm
It was kimerlynn61, Holly. Not a hugely prolific poster, I don’t think.
stu
3 Apr 07 at 1:39 pm